Top 10 warning signs that you're about to get fired

Paul Lines By Paul Lines, 30th Oct 2010 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL http://nut.bz/1x3fwc03/
Posted in Wikinut>Business>Employment

It is usually possible to notice when you are no longer a valued employee as these warning signs will show

The worry

Are you constantly looking over your shoulder, wondering about the possibility of being fired? If so, here are some warnings signs that might help you to recognise that this is either likely to happen in the future or immediately imminent.

Sometimes you get these strange premonitions. You wake up in the morning and everthing is fine, but when you get to the office, there is that deodorant of P45 in the air (PS: P45 is the final payslip you get in the UK when your job is over). It all starts with a feeling, but as you take the following steps through the office, it becomes more and more real.

10 warning signs

1) The usual happy "good morning" from the receptionist is missing, instead she mumbles something unintelligible and bury's her head in the waste basket, searching for something that doesn't exist, until you have past through.

2) Your coat falls to the floor because someone has removed you coat stand and the comfy leather chair that you enjoyed lazing in yesterday, seems to have mysteriously transformed into a hard, high backed wooden chair without even a cushion.

3) At least the computer is still there. Strange, it does not accept your password. Ah well, these things happen, time to call IT support. Your secretary, or at least the voice at the end of the phone tells you that they your authorisation has been cancelled.

4) Ah a note on your desk. Report to your manager at 2 pm. Must be that promotion you were after. But why has he addressed it to "Has-been?" Must be a typing error.

5) Ah a client arrives! When are these people removing all of the furniture from my room? Obviously I am getting new equipment to go with my promoted position.

6)Time for coffee. You reach for the phone. It is not there. Obviously being replaced with the rest of the equipment. Ah well! You rise and make your way to the canteen, but one of the manager stops you at the door, saying that you are not allowed in there today. Puzzlement flits across your brow until you realise that they are probably arranging a party to celebrate your promotion.

7) Back to the office. Why wont the door open? Must be the workmen. Perhaps they are redecorating and have locked the door by mistake. You wander off to find the receptionist for a spare key, but stop by the lift and look down into the big brown box sitting there.

8) All you personal stuff is in the box. Perhaps they are moving you to a new office. Perhaps on the third floor with higher management. You smile broadly as you press the lift button and look at your watch. Time to get the praise of your boss and the new position you have been looking forward to.

9) There is not a word said in the managers office. He looks up at you for a long time. His eyes are hard and the normal cheerful smile is missing. You open your mouth to speak and he shakes his head slowly. Obvously he is so unhappy to lose you to this new position, that he is too emotional to speak. You know you are going to miss him too, but it is not as if you are leaving the company. Slowly he hands a sheet of paper to you and you look down at it. TERMINATED is the word that stands out. But that is not how you spell promoted, is it?

10) Standing outside the office on the sidewalk again, with a security guard staring out at you from behind the office door, as if daring you to try and regain you former position. Suddenly you know it is for real.

YOU HAVE BEEN FIRED!

Tags

Career Tips, Employment, Failure, Fired, Humour, Sacked, Satire, Unemployment, Work

Meet the author

author avatar Paul Lines
Having spent a large part of my working life as a business consultant, I am now a full time freelance writer offering content for online and print publishers

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Comments

author avatar Mark Gordon Brown
31st Oct 2010 (#)

yup, sometimes the writing is on the wall so to speak.

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